34 Things You Didn't Know About Nike Anderson

34 Things You Didn’t Know About Me

Last year, I wrote a post titled, 50 Facts About Me, to welcome my new supporters to the family. The post consisted of random questions I pulled from Google’s search engine that varied from where my hometown is to what countries I’ve traveled to. Considering this post garnered a lot of traffic to my blog, making it among my top ten blog posts of 2018, it’s safe to assume you all enjoyed it—or at least thought it was interesting enough to click on?

In any event, we’ve got some new members to our blogging family and I figured I’d write a similar post to help everyone get to know me even better. Last week, I celebrated my thirty-fourth birthday, so it’s fitting that I offer thirty-four fun facts about me that I haven’t mentioned yet. The first few questions are related to blogging. The rest are random, yet interesting. I hope you enjoy this post!

34 Things You Didn't Know About Nike Anderson

 

1. How did you first get into blogging?

I believe it was the year 2010 when I first got a taste of the blogging world. I sort of fell into it. I joined a social media platform for women with natural hair and started sharing my natural hair journey with other women of color. Although this platform no longer exists, some of my writings are still floating around the Internet to this day.

 

2. What inspired you to start your recent blog?

Loneliness. When I started homeschooling my children, it felt like we were the only black homeschool family in the world. My blog allowed me to connect not just with other black homeschoolers, but with homeschoolers from many racial, cultural, and geographical backgrounds. It was my way of saying “I’m here and I’m with you” to all those homeschool moms that felt the same loneliness.

 

3. What is your greatest blogging failure so far and what did you learn from that?

Hmmm. I would say not doing adequate research. When I first started blogging in 2010, I would share any old info’ that popped up in my search engine and it came back to bite me. These days, I seek scholarly sources and am more thorough with my research when applicable.

 

4. What is your proudest achievement as a blogger so far?

Hands down, the number of people I’ve helped. Whether I’ve helped them find a valuable resource, peace of mind, or encouragement, it always warms my heart to open an email from someone who just wants to say thank you.

 

5. What is your greatest achievement outside of blogging?

I’d have to say my mental and spiritual growth. My skin’s a little thicker, I’m more confident, more spiritual, and am pretty much happy and thankful to be who I am and where I’m at in life.

 

6. Who are some of your favorite bloggers?

 

7. Is blogging your profession or just a hobby?

My blog is definitely a hobby right now. While it has helped me earn money, I simply haven’t had the time to make this a full-time gig yet. Contrary to what some people think, even blogging part-time is very time-consuming.

 

8. How often do you communicate with your followers?

Pretty regularly. Join me on Instagram where I post family snapshots and video stories at least four times a week. Follow me on Facebook where I share inspiring stories, budget-friendly resources, and snapshots of our day-in-the-life. I also like to read your blog posts on a weekly basis (if you’re a fellow blogger), so it’s likely you’ll see me drop by with a like and/or comment!

 

9. What do you do in your spare time?

When I’m not blogging or teaching, I’m creating educational resources for Nike Anderson’s Classroom, reading self-help books, writing musings, listening to motivational podcasts or Youtube videos, getting my blood flowing, helping my husband run the family business, exploring local (or far away) beautiful places with my family, eating Mexican food, window shopping, hanging out with friends, laughing until I cry, drinking coffee, or sleeping.

 

10. What are some red flags you watch out for in daily life?

It may seem weird, but too much praise. Sincere compliments are wonderful, but too much flattery makes me suspicious of a person’s intentions. Why? Because it NEVER, I repeat NEVER ended well when my relationships/friendships started off with incessant praise. Sometimes people use flattery as a manipulation tool, so be careful!

 

11. What “old person” things do you do?

Use slang incorrectly, say things like “Is that what the young people are doing these days?” or “What happened to real music?,” declare how “hip” I am, get excited about coupons, retell the same stories to anyone who’ll listen—okay, I’ll stop embarrassing myself now.

 

12. What makes you roll your eyes every time you hear it?

“Natural hair is not for me.” Oh, the irony of that statement. God gave it to you. It’s for you, boo.

 

13. How do you judge a person?

By how they talk about other people and/or treat people with lower economic status. I once read a statement that said, “How people treat others whom they believe are beneath them is very telling of their character.” So far, so accurate.

 

14. When was the last time you were snooping and found something you wish you hadn’t?

I Googled myself once (under my then blogging alias about 8 years ago) and found someone had shared one of my blog posts. The comments underneath that shared post were hateful and non-constructive. It took a while for me to get over it. But it was a lesson learned in so many ways. The primary lesson? It’s none of my business what other people think about me. 

 

15. If you were moving to another country, but could only pack one carry-on sized bag, what would you pack?

  • My Bible.
  • My cell phone.
  • My laptop.
  • My intimates (bras in my size are difficult to find and are expensive).
  • My family photos.
  • My important documents.
  • My makeup.
  • My good jeans (they’re high waisted and very forgiving).
  • Some leggings and comfy tops (I know how to pack military style).
  • My favorite bathrobe.
  • My Ninja to make smoothies.
  • My natural hair products.
  • A converter for my plugs.
  • A pair of heels.

 

16. If you could have an all-expenses paid trip to see any famous world monument, which monument would you choose?

The Burj Khalifa in Dubai. It’s currently the tallest skyscraper in the world and I would love to take my boys (who love architecture and skyscrapers) to see it in person.

 

17. What’s the most ridiculous thing you have bought?

During my undergrad years, I thought I was purchasing a $99 refurbished laptop from eBay (I know, I know). It was supposed to be a gift for my fiancé (now husband). Turns out when I received it, it was basically a shell with NOTHING inside. No motherboard, no nothing. The computer techs practically laughed us out of the store when we asked if there was anything they could do to “fix” it.

 

18. What outdoor activity haven’t you tried, but would like to?

Zip-lining. My husband just tried it last weekend and I would like to work up the courage to try it one day.

 

19. What’s the worst backhanded compliment someone gave you?

“I love your home—My husband and I are considering downgrading to something small like this.” It’s probably not the worst backhanded compliment, but it’s all I can think of at the moment. Believe me, homegirl was being super shady when she said it. It was a home my husband and I shared when we lived in Atlanta, Georgia nearly seven years ago.

 

20. If you were given one thousand acres of land that you didn’t need to pay taxes on but couldn’t sell, what would you do with it?

Grow crops for food. I’ve been liking the idea of growing my own food more and more lately, and I just might do it one day.

 

21. What about the opposite sex confuses you the most?

The thought-process behind throwing dirty clothes onto the floor NEXT to the laundry basket. Didn’t know this was an epidemic until I spoke with other wives with the same problem. Love you anyway, hubby! It’s all in fun!

 

22. What kinds of things do you like to cook or are good at cooking?

I’m told I make a great spaghetti meat sauce, baked mac n cheese, homemade BBQ sauce, and homemade chewy sugar cookies—just to name a few. I actually don’t like cooking, but I love when people enjoy my food—especially my hubby and children.

 

23. What life skills are rarely taught but extremely useful?

How to handle and overcome adversity. I think too many people give up way too soon. We’d have more successful people if we were taught to expect adversity and were given the tools to come out on the winning side of it.

 

24. What’s the most historic thing that has happened in your lifetime?

There are a few; the 9/11 attacks on the WTC, having the first black POTUS, and the 2015 presidential election in Nigeria—which was the most important election in that country since 1999, and I happened to be visiting during that time. I missed my flight back home to the States due to demonstrations happening in Lagos.

 

25. What’s the most awkward thing that happens to you on a regular basis?

The long, awkward pause when someone asks me how old my children are, what grade they’re in, how many years I’ve been married, or how old I am. For some reason, the answers don’t come to me straight away. Like, I swear I know how old my kids are, haha.

 

26. What’s the most annoying noise?

The sound of my children asking for water for the umpteenth time after going to bed. Haha.

 

27. What animal is the most majestic?

I love lions and tigers (you know you want to finish the song). But seriously, I am a fan of big cats. Have you ever looked into their eyes? So beautiful and regal.

 

28. What seemingly innocent question makes you think “It’s a trap!”?

The good ol’ “What do you do for a living?” I think most creatives hate this question because it simply can’t be summarized in a way that’s pleasing to itching ears. Also, I’ve found that this question stems from one of two places; 1.) Someone wondering how you can afford something they deem a luxury. 2.) Someone waiting for the opportunity to brag about what THEY do. Whatever the case, either your answer will cause them to feel inferior or superior. Neither is a good outcome. I do understand, however, that in some cases this is harmless small talk.

 

29. What small change greatly improves a person’s appearance?

A genuine smile. There’s nothing more beautiful than a face that reflects a heart at peace.

 

30. What topic could you spend hours talking about?

Ugh. natural hair. I low-key get excited whenever someone brings up the topic. I love everything about natural hair from the spiritual journey I’ve experienced, the discovery and acceptance of self, to the science of taking care of it. It’s all so fascinating. So much so that I was once a regular contributor to an online natural hair care magazine. Best hobby ever. But actually, I like talking about anything that’s helped me grow as a person, really—faith, homeschool, family, parenting, you name it!

 

31. What’s the weirdest thing that has happened to you while working at your job?

A couple years ago, I was hit on by a married man in front of his wife (and ALL my colleagues). I was working the front desk at a part-time job after relocating from Atlanta to Middle Georgia and the man blatantly flirted with me while his wife was standing next to him. She said nothing at all but stood there nervously smiling. And, yes, I’m sure it was his wife as I was helping them fill out pertinent paperwork. I thought I was on a prank television show or something. I couldn’t fill out his paperwork fast enough. Mortifying.

 

32. What are some of the most common misconceptions people have about you?

  • That I’m shy.
  • That I’m high maintenance.
  • That I don’t have a sense of humor.

In all fairness, I can see why that’d be an initial impression, as I’m a woman of few words around people I don’t know very well. That’s because I’m trying to discern what type of people they are. You’ll discover a lot about people when you close your mouth and just listen to them speak.

 

33. What was the biggest realization you had about yourself?

I am super TMI. Typically, this happens around people I’m comfortable with. I don’t know how many times a friend has lovingly said, “I didn’t need to know that.” I’m getting better though. It took a few unfavorable experiences for me to wise up and learn when to keep things to myself.

 

34. What values are most important to you?

Faith, peace, love, family, education, health, authenticity, and persistence. But above all; faith, peace, and love.


 

Can you relate to any of my answers? Let me know in the comments!

Until next time, friends…

SAHM? How to Not Be Miserable.

10 Ways Not to Be Miserable as a Stay-at-Home Mom

Welcome to the New Year!

Okay, so being a stay-at-home mom is no joke. Can we all raise our hand and agree?

I know, I know—we chose this lot in life. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t get challenging. And it certainly doesn’t mean we can’t acknowledge it.

So, here I am acknowledging it.

Miserable is a harsh word, but it makes for a great title. I am not miserable. But I do acknowledge that some stay-at-home moms are—and that I, too, have experienced those challenging moments.

I’m not talking about clinical depression or any mental disorder that requires medical attention. I’m talking about feelings of unhappiness, discomfort, and/or inadequacy.

Perhaps I can be of some help. I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for nine years to two boys, ages 5 and 9. On top of that, I also homeschool, run a business, volunteer, the list goes on.

I’ve experienced a season where I hardly saw my husband due to his job, where I had to care for a newborn and a toddler while battling the baby blues, where I didn’t live close to family or friends, and where I felt isolated, anxious, and alone. And that is just naming a few!

I may not understand exactly what you’re going through, but I have an idea. Won’t you stick around and read what I’ve learned during those seasons?

Whether you’re a stay-at-home mom or an old faithful reader of my blog, I know that at least one of these points will speak to you.

Note: I don’t mean to assume you’re a Believer, I can only write from my personal perspective. If you’re not a Believer and want to be, please refer to the bottom of this post.

So, without further ado, on with the blog:

(This post may contain affiliate links. Please see my disclaimer for more information.)



10 Ways Not to Be Miserable as a Stay-at-Home Mom

 

 

1. Know Your Purpose.

Knowing your purpose is directly linked to knowing who you are. When you know who you are and what you’re doing here, you increase your sense of self-worth and wellbeing. This is essential because some negative opinions about stay-at-home moms can really hurt. But when we know who we are, and understand our purpose, those unsolicited opinions roll off our backs easier.

You are not “just a mom.”

You are not “lazy.”

You are not “outdated.”

You heard the call and you answered!

Many stay-at-home moms are called to this particular ministry to inspire people only THEY can inspire. And yes, I said “ministry.” In whatever we do, whether it’s working a corporate job or being a stay-at-home-mom, our primary focus should be to glorify God, love others, and spread the good news wherever we are.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart

There are stay-at-home moms in your city that don’t know Christ or who’ve fallen away from the faith—women only YOU can reach. This is why we shouldn’t only associate with people “like us.” I’ve made some of the best connections with people I’d never expect to have anything in common with.

So, stay on course and realize this lifestyle you chose has more significance than you think.

Your children are the future and they need YOU.

The stay-at-home mom community needs YOU.

And God is working through YOU!

 

2. Know it’s Supposed to be Challenging.

Being a stay-at-home mom is not for the faint of heart. You can’t be ready to quit at the first sign of adversity. If it’s truly a calling then, as with all callings, you can expect to face challenges. Challenges aren’t meant to break you, but to edify, improve character, and increase faith. Therefore, expect:

Frustration.

Tears.

Guilt.

The desire to quit.

Feeling like it’s not worth the trouble.

When these things happen, it can be tough. But remember, we aren’t operating in our own strength, but God’s. When we expect challenges, we eliminate making permanent decisions based on temporary emotions.

When we expect challenges... Quote, Meme, Inspiration

Even more? When we expect challenges, our first inclination will not be to get “sad” when they appear, but to armor up and fight!

 

3. Establish Your Village.

We’ve all heard the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child.” No truer words have ever been spoken. We weren’t meant to take on the responsibility of childrearing on our own. It’s not healthy for us or our children. Children need to be exposed to varying personalities, perspectives, and environments to help them become well-rounded adults.

We need companionship and support to help edify us.

It wasn’t always this way but, these days, I’m fortunate enough to have the support of my family, friends, and community. But if you don’t live close to family or friends, sign your kids up for local classes and activities. The public library is a great place to start if you want to know what resources and events your city has to offer. They usually have pamphlets at their front desk, or you can ask a knowledgable librarian. Many events I’ve attended were not advertised online so a Google search may not be your best bet.

And dare I say, join a mom group?

I know, I know. It’s HARD!

You tried, and it didn’t work.

Or, you simply just don’t want to do it.

But hear me out, you will never find the perfect group of women. You, yourself, are not perfect. There will always be some women in that group you can’t stand the sight of. But I promise you, if you stick with it, you can establish healthy friendships. But, you must be determined.

Most women give up too easily. I, myself, gave up easily at one point. But by God’s grace, I was able to connect with other women. And if this introverted, socially awkward black woman can make friends in a 99% white support group in the Confederate South, you can do it, too.

 

3. Create an Income Stream.

Contributing to the household income can be a satisfying feeling. But you don’t have to leave your home to do it. Today, streaming additional income from home has never been more attainable. All you need is a skill you’ve honed and a computer with internet access.

Proverbs 18:16 reminds us that our gift will make room for us!

A mans gift. Proverbs 18:16

I know plenty of moms who’ve put their gifts to use to earn income. They have virtual shops where they sell one-of-a-kind crochet designs. They host webinars that help people manage their finances. They write ebooks and author resources. The possibilities are endless!

I, myself, create educational resources for teachers and parents around the globe, and it’s one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. Earning money is just a bonus!

 

4. Make a Difference.

Some of the happiest moms I know are those who serve others. Ever hear the adage “the quickest way to get over your own problems is to help someone else with theirs?” Research shows making a positive difference in the lives of others increases our sense of self-worth and combats anxiety and depression.

I’ll be the first to raise my hand and attest to that. One of the reasons I continue to blog and create resources is because of the emails, DMs, and comments I receive from people who’ve felt I’ve positively impacted their lives in some way. Reading the words “thank you” and “this is just what I needed” never gets old for me!

Getting involved in your community is another way to make a difference. Find a cause you’re passionate about and go for it! That’s where it’s helpful to be a part of a mom group or club. When you belong to a community, it’s easier to be presented with opportunities to serve.

And I want to note that, above all else, you’re making a positive impact on the lives of your children when you serve your family. After all, your family should be your first ministry.

 

5. Step into Your Role.

You are the manager of your home. Yet, many moms stray from the true definition of “manager.”

But what does a manager do?

The purpose of a manager is to set goals, decide what needs to be done to achieve those goals, and delegate responsibilities to ensure those goals are met. You were not meant to do everything alone.

I’ll repeat it louder for the ones in the back:

YOU were not meant to do everything ALONE! 

Don’t you dare do all the housework if you have children of age who are capable of doing chores.

Don’t you dare not consider asking your husband to contribute to keeping the house in order.

Of course, everyone’s situation is different. Perhaps you have an infant or a husband that’s deployed. Perhaps your village is non-existent. But if you can help it, never do everything by yourself. Even children as young as three-years-old can pick up after themselves and wipe down a table using a non-toxic cleaning spray.

And there’s no shame in hiring help if you can afford to. Hire someone to do your lawn care, shampoo your carpets, or deep clean your bathrooms every week. I’m not ballin’ like that at the moment, but if you are, go for it! We must stop shaming moms who hire help and we must stop making overworked, worn-out moms the face of motherhood.

 

6. Count Your Wins.

Let’s forget about how many times we’ve failed. Instead, let’s remember to count our victories. One method that helped me in the past was taking inventory on a regular basis. Every so often, I would ask myself what I did right and reflect on those things. When I started this exercise, it suddenly occurred to me how much I focused on my failures and how rarely I thought about my wins.

Consider this verse:

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Philippians 4:8).

Whatever is true...Philippians 4:8

Let’s emphasize, “If anything is excellent or praiseworthy.” You can’t be doing it all wrong. There has got to be something you’re excellent at and is deserving of praise.

When we reflect on our failures, we start identifying ourselves as failures. Which is simply not true. Romans 8:37 tells us we are more than conquerors! Furthermore, we must remember we are what we think. For “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7).

 

7. Stop Comparing.

Whether you think you’re better or worse than the next mom, comparison is a joy stealer! I know it’s tempting, but please resist the urge.

Most people talk about comparing yourself to others in the form of feeling “less than.” I want to talk about the other type of comparison. It’s easy to see why feeling inferior to another mom isn’t healthy, but I would venture to say that feeling superior to other moms isn’t healthy either.

Consider this:

Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you (Romans 12:3).

We must remember not to mistake arrogance with confidence. Arrogant moms tend to have a revolving door of friends because they depend on putting others down to feel better about themselves. But confidence doesn’t depend on the inferiority of other people.

Don’t be that mom!

I love this verse:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Just look at your own work to see if you have done anything to be proud of (Galatians 6:4). 

It’s easier said than done. But it’s not impossible. What has really helped me to stop comparing myself to others was to live out Galatians 6:4 and focus on my own endeavors. Do you see why I recommended seeking volunteer opportunities and establishing healthy hobbies and friendships? You’ve got to be so busy enjoying an edifying life that you don’t have time to reflect on what the next mom is doing.

 

8. Monitor Your Self-Talk.

Self-esteem is measured by the way we think and feel about ourselves. I used to think of myself as a confident person, but I became amazed at the things I told myself when I wasn’t paying attention. A devotional by Barb Roose, titled Beautiful Already, was what inspired me to REALLY listen to the lies I told myself about myself.

Even today, I must still take heed and pay attention, lest I subconsciously fall into negative thought-patterns.

Why is this important?

Because when we don’t feel good about ourselves, we project those insecurities onto others—including our own children!

So watch phrases like:

I’m not good enough.

Nobody likes me. 

I’m failing at motherhood.

My kids aren’t like those kids.

Remember when I said you are what you think? Whatever you meditate on becomes your reality. Of course, we must be real with ourselves if we need to improve in certain areas, but constantly putting ourselves down isn’t doing us any favors.

You are what you think. Inspiration, Quotes, Memes

9. Practice Self-Care.

I’m going to repeat this airline cliché:

Put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you assist others.

Self-care means different things to different people. For me, it means ensuring I’m pouring enough into myself so that I have plenty left over to pour into others.

Can I be real? I went an entire week without practicing the self-care habits I normally do. I was a complete mess! There are many excuses women use as to why we can’t put themselves first. But the reality is, we make time for what’s important. The question is:

Why don’t we consider ourselves important enough to make time for? 

Exercise.

Quiet time.

Fellowship.

Hobbies.

These things are not luxuries. They’ve been proven time and again to improve our quality of life. They are necessary. I know moms who get up at the crack of dawn just to ensure they have time to exercise, meditate, and work on their hobbies. It’s that important to them. I, myself, know that I’m a better person when I practice self-care.

I know it’s difficult to develop these habits, but all you need is to take one step at a time. Can you commit to seven minutes a day of physical activity? Ten minutes a day to do something you enjoy? One day a month to meet with a friend? Wake up just ten minutes earlier to pray and meditate?

It all starts small! You can increase over time.

Here’s a seven-minute workout routine I like to do when I don’t have much time. Here’s my favorite twenty-minute HIIT workout at the moment.

 

10. Appreciate Your Season.

I can say this, and still, most of us will not feel the truth of this statement until after the fact—savor the moment.

If you don’t stop and smell the roses in the spring, you’ll regret it and long for them in the winter.

Life is full of seasons. As a stay-at-home mom, I’ve gone through many of them.

When I was a nursing mom, I desperately wanted my body back. When I was a new mom, I desperately wanted my baby to sleep through the night.  I think you can see where I’m going with this.

I remember talking with a fellow homeschool mom at the local skating rink. After exchanging a few comical mom stories, she stared into the distance and said:

“If my kids went back to being small like yours, I would play with them more. Take long walks and crunch the leaves with them. I would steal more kisses, more hugs. I spent their childhood waiting for them to get older, be more independent. Now that they are, I realize they are never going to be small again.”

Wow! I absolutely loved every word she said! You will NEVER regret spending more time with your children. How fortunate are we that we get to spend even more time with our children than the average American mom?


I want to sign off by saying, your feelings are valid! This post is not meant to guilt-trip or condemn, but to offer a bit of advice that has helped me over the years.

Of course, I am not an expert. I don’t know everything. All I know is that being a stay-at-home mom is taxing. But what greater purpose to labor for than for the wellbeing of our family!

Until next time, friend…



Want to change your life and become a Believer of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ? Say this prayer with faith and conviction, and then find a fellow Believer who can point you in the right direction.

Sinners Prayer for Salvation.

Did you just give your life to Christ? Email me and tell me about it!

 

 

Looking for some FREE resources for your little one? Check out Nike Anderson’s Classroom and follow me there to be the first to know when I upload a new freebie!

Nike Anderson's Classroom Free & Affordable Educational Resources

 

 

My Journey to Matured Confidence

Welcome to the part of my blog where I share raw unadulterated details about my personal journey. Not because I want to, but because I must. Sharing our story, no matter how great or small, is part of being human. It’d be selfish of me to experience such self-transformation and not share and inspire others.

So here we are! I already talked about 12 Ways I Overcame Jealousy and Self Confidence | 3 Ways to Feel Beautiful. Today, I want to talk about my journey to matured confidence and illustrate that confidence is like a muscle that needs to be built and strengthened.

My journey to self-confidence started when I was a little girl. I wasn’t what some considered to be a particularly “beautiful” child. I was timid, had dominant Nigerian features, and wore thick glasses that made my eyes look like tiny seeds.

Before I go any further, I am NOT in any way saying I wasn’t beautiful because of my Nigerian features. What I am saying is that the people around me could only see ONE type of beauty—and my “Africanness” certainly didn’t fit that mold.

As a small child I never really thought much about my looks. My mother, who is very fair skinned, talked about how much she loved brown skin tones. She gifted me ethnic dolls and did her best to portray the message that brown is beautiful.

I was beautiful to her, and that was all that mattered.

Until I became interested in boys. I found out very quickly that I was the ugly friend that no one wanted to date.

That’s when I started to take notice.

I noticed I didn’t look like the leading women in romantic movies. I noticed I didn’t look anything like the “cute” girls at schools. I even noticed that, although I shared a similar skin tone, my features were much more pronounced than the dainty features on ethnic Barbie dolls.

Nike Anderson Quotes

But do you want to know something interesting? I wondered, even as a nine-year-old, why I couldn’t be beautiful, too. I mean, I knew I didn’t resemble what everyone else considered to be beautiful, but a small authentic part of me knew that beauty didn’t have to be so one-dimensional.

What would happen next would be the thing I’m most proud of. I just threw my hands up and decided it didn’t matter. I may not be beautiful to other people. I may get overlooked in the dating department. I may even get called names like four-eyes, African booty-scratcher, ugly, and coke-bottles (kids are so lovely, aren’t they? LOL). But, one thing that no one could take away from me was my intelligence. My knowledge. My wisdom. My joy.

I probably didn’t know I was being this deep in the fourth grade, but looking back at it, I knew that physical beauty wasn’t everything. I put more focus and energy into being one of the smartest kids in class than into what I looked like. In this, I experienced a different type of beauty, a different type of confidence that couldn’t be uprooted. To others, I lacked physical appeal, but they couldn’t deny that I was disciplined, hardworking, determined, and creative.

And then this happened:

Sometime during middle school, I suddenly bloomed. Maybe it was because I ditched the glasses for contact lenses. Maybe it was my overly-developed teenaged figure. But, as if out of nowhere, everyone started to see what I’d been seeing all along—beauty. It was a different kind of beauty. An interesting kind of beauty. But beauty, nonetheless.

For the first time people started referring to me as “beautiful,” and it felt good.

So good that it became addictive and I started entrusting my self-worth to validation from pubescent boys. I became full of myself. Yes, I was still a “gifted” student but it became more important for me to fit in and be accepted by the “in-crowd.” To the outside world, I looked like a young lady oozing with confidence—I was smart, pretty, and popular. But only I knew the truth—that deep down I felt this void because these external things were all that I had to bank on. If I was no longer considered pretty or popular my entire teenage world would shatter.

I don’t remember the exact year, but there was an impactful day I’d spent hanging out with my aunt at a friend’s barbecue. As my aunt introduced me to her friends, some of them had kindly complimented my unique beauty. My aunt’s response? “Yes, she’s beautiful, but she’s also very intelligent.” I talk about this moment often because it awakened the nine-year-old in me—the little girl who knew that beauty was subjective and that I had other things going for me beyond what the eye could see.

Nike Anderson Quotes

I had the right idea as a nine-year-old but later learned that even intelligence could be subjective, a confidence crutch if you will.

I needed something more.

Yes, my teenaged self could think of several positive adjectives that described me. But who was I? Who was I truly? And why was I here? Thus, started my journey to what I like to call matured confidence.

I wasn’t raised in a religious household, but that didn’t stop God from reaching me. I didn’t need a sermon, an altar call, or any of that. I knew His voice. I knew He was calling me. And I knew only He had the answers to my pressing questions—that He would show me who I was and what I was doing here. So, I made the unpopular decision to give my life to Christ, not to live a life of religious rules, but to live a life powered by faith and love.

You see, religion and faith are two separate things. Religion subtracts and divides. Faith adds and multiplies.

Religion and Faith Quotes, Inspiration, Memes

I’m not going to preach. That is not my intention. But in order for this post to be most authentic, I must include this detail of my life. Where this journey to confidence really took off.

My life wasn’t perfect after accepting Christ. In fact, I made some poor choices in high school and even poorer choices in undergrad. It was a struggle to live authentically when a huge part of me just wanted to do what everyone else was doing because it was easier.

Yes, it was so easy to fit in. Standing out took courage—and it was also very lonely.

When girls in my high school were out having sex and getting their hearts broken, I made the bold decision to wait until marriage. I knew that any guy who saw my value as God saw it—and as I saw it—would be willing to wait with me. But that choice didn’t come without opposition. Guys made up stories to slander me and girls poked fun at my virginity.

In my adult years, when my coworkers chose to sit around and gossip during lunch breaks, I chose a quiet table outdoors to sit and read. I saw no point in bringing others down to make myself feel good. I already felt good about myself. But, of course, this meant I’d eventually become the subject of their gossip. I was even overlooked and lost promotions to colleagues who habitually came to work late and did more talking than working—but they fit in.

I mention these examples not to appear self-righteous, but to reiterate my point. It would’ve been easier for me to “fit in.” Why? Because standing out meant getting called nasty names, losing friends, and being subjected to rumors made up about me. To a mature woman, this might not have been a huge deal. But to a young woman growing in maturity, being an outcast was a real struggle.

Looking back at my younger years, as a woman now in her thirties, I can see clearly the levels of growth in my confidence. I didn’t just wake up one day and decide “I love me—truly love me.” Self-love was, and still is, a process.

Where does my confidence come from? It comes from knowing who I am. Who I truly am. The core of my being deeply rooted in Christ that you must experience for yourself to truly understand. It comes from recognizing that true confidence does none of the following:

  1. Compares itself to others.
  2. Tears others down to lift itself up.
  3. Puts its energy into hatred.
  4. Places itself above others.
  5. Strays from its authentic self.

True Confidence Quotes, Memes, Inspiration

No. People who walk in true confidence acknowledge and respect that everyone has different levels of gifts and talents, is on their own journey, and has a significant purpose to realize. Confident people build others up, put their energy into faith and love, and never place themselves above others. Most importantly, they never stray from their authenticity.

To this day, some will never see me as beautiful enough, smart enough, popular enough, or whatever “enoughs” they can think of. But I will never know it because I’m not paying attention. I’m too busy focusing my energy on who I was created to be and what I was created to do.

And can I just say that acknowledgment of one’s own beauty, gifts, talents, accomplishments, intelligence, etc., does not make a person conceited or vain? Conceited and vain people have an exaggerated sense of self-importance.  There’s a difference between someone aware of what God has blessed them with and someone who thinks they’re better than other people because of what God has blessed them with.

I want to close by saying I have no intention of posting this because I’m not sure it even makes sense. You’d be surprised at how many things I’ve written that I never post. But if you see this post that has been hiding in my documents since May 2018, that means I finally did it.

Until next time, friends…

 

Is Homeschool Your Calling?

5 Ways to Know Homeschool Is Your Calling

I fell to my knees. My hands cupped my face. Tears fell into my palms. And I finally cried.

I wanted to know once and for all, “Is this homeschool thing for me?”

It sure didn’t seem like it.

Yet, He finally had me where He wanted me.

God, that is.

For months I’d suppressed the question, “Is this homeschool thing for me?” I’d wondered if I’d just made this whole “calling” thing up. If this was really what God wanted our family to do.

Each day felt riskier than the last. Three years in and I wondered “What on earth are we actually doing? Are we actually trusting ourselves to prepare our BLACK sons for academic success?”

And because fear begets more fear, I started worrying about other things. Financing resources. Hiccups in the family business. Lack of security without a corporate job. Crazy healthcare costs. Taxes.

The light at the end of the tunnel grew so dim that anxiety was the only darkness I could see.

And I fell to my knees.

“Lord!” I cried. “Show us…Show us that we’re walking on the right path. And if we’re not, give us the courage to walk away.”

Suddenly, I couldn’t cry anymore. It was as if peace had forced its way into my troubled spirit. I kneeled there, hands still cupping my face, and listened.

And then a voice said: “Deep down you know that putting your boys into public school isn’t the answer. Deep down you know you weren’t called to live life like everyone else.”

And that voice was right. I wanted to be “normal.” I wanted our family to be “normal.” But I also knew that “normal” came with its own set of problems. That I’d just be trading my current set of problems in for new ones—trading my current fears for new fears.

No. What I truly wanted was peace. Not to be “normal.” The peace of knowing that whatever happens, God works things out for the good of those who love Him and who have been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

I tried to sleep that night, but I just couldn’t. I was thinking about this blog post. First, the title popped into my mind “Ways to Know Homeschool Is Your Calling.” Then, I went through all the points in my head, as I lay there desperately attempting to enter into rest.

“Get up!” I felt a voice saying. “You said you wanted to know if homeschool is your calling, and now I’m giving you the concise reply you are seeking.”

So, I rolled out of bed at 1am and headed to the office with my notebook. Now, here we are: 5 Ways to Know If Homeschool is Your Calling. I hope this post blesses you as much as it has blessed me.

 

1. You have a vision.

Without a Vision Meme, Quote, Inspiration

Vision is everything. In our case, it’s what my husband and I couldn’t see that made our vision plain. When we started discussing our vision for the future of our son’s education, we couldn’t see him in public school. In fact, we’d initially planned on placing him in a private school once he reached school age.

It wasn’t until I’d stumbled upon a text illustrating the rise of homeschool that a lightbulb went off. I didn’t know anything about homeschool, but it seemed like the perfect fulfillment of our vision.

Homeschool seemed right. But it also seemed far-fetched considering we were in no position to homeschool at the time. Still, we envisioned the places we could travel with our children, the types of subjects we could teach them, the freedom our boys would have to learn at their own pace, and the freedom they’d have to be themselves.

Little did we know, after five years of flirting with the idea of homeschool, we’d finally take that leap of courage. But it started with a vision.

God always provides a vision, even when the calling isn’t meant to be fulfilled until decades later. God gave Abraham a visual reference to His calling on Abraham’s life when He told him his “descendants will be as numerous as the stars in the sky” (Gen. 26:4). It took twenty-five years for that promise to be fulfilled.

Similarly, as a young man, Joseph had prophetic dreams that someday he’d be in a position of power and reverence. He could envision his family bowing down to him even though it didn’t make perfect sense at the time. More than a decade later, that vision was fulfilled when Joseph became second in command in Egypt.

It all starts with a vision.

 

2. It intimidates you.

If it scares you it might be a good thing to try. Inspiration, Quotes, Memes

I remember the mental struggle I went through right before submitting my Declaration of Intent to homeschool. The year ahead seemed very intimidating. I wasn’t sure if I could teach my son how to read, and I wasn’t even sure if I could teach him anything at all for that matter. I weighed the pros and cons in my mind. The cons scared me greatly and served as the foundation for my many objections.

What if my children don’t learn enough? What if they don’t make any friends? What if they hate it? What if they don’t get accepted into college? To ease my anxieties, I bargained with myself—and God—that I’d be brave enough to “try homeschool” for one full school year and see if it’s truly a fit for our family.

You know who else bargained with God when they received an intimidating calling?

Moses.

You’ll read in Exodus that during the exchange between God and Moses, Moses had objections to leading the Israelites out of Egypt. “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” He asked (Exodus 3:11). That was his first objection. His second objection doubted the One who sent him. His third objection doubted the people he was called to lead. His fourth objection doubted his qualifications. Finally, Moses just outright denies the calling and asks God to, “Send someone else” (Exodus 4:13).

 

3. You have to make sacrifices.

True Success Requires Sacrifice. Inspiration, Quotes, Memes

Financial sacrifice is among the most popular challenges of the homeschool lifestyle. After all, in a typical homeschool family, one parent must either refrain from working or cut back on work hours.

Our family is no different. The decision to homeschool meant we’d be taking a financial hit. That meant we wouldn’t be able to indulge in the luxuries of life without penalty. Dining out, family vacations, new cars, new gadgets, and other luxuries were few and far between. Instead, we put money toward homeschool resources, enrichment activities, and other necessities.

And that was just the beginning.

Essentially, we sacrificed our comfort zone—the ability to call ourselves a “normal” family. Nothing is “normal” about homeschool. It changed the trajectory of our life. It changed our thought-patterns. It changed the way we saw ourselves. It changed the way we saw the world. It forced us to connect with people who don’t look like us, think like us, or believe like us.

But there is nothing new under the sun, especially when it comes to sacrifices and callings.

In the Bible, Moses had to sacrifice his comfortable lifestyle in the Egyptian palace in order to fulfill his calling to lead the Israelites to freedom. Esther was willing to sacrifice her life and position as Queen of Persia to fulfill her calling to save her people from slaughter. Joseph unknowingly had to sacrifice his freedom to fulfill his calling to become second in command in Egypt, where he’d be in position to save many lives from a severe famine. Catch my drift?

Homeschool may not be as profound as the aforementioned callings, but it does come with its own set of challenges that will force you out of your comfort zone.

 

4. It ignites a passion in you.

Passion Memes, Inspiration, Quotes

Even with all the intimidation, the challenges, and the sacrifices weighing you down, something inside you keeps pushing you forward. I’ve realized that “something” is called passion. Passion is the reason I get right back up after a bad day (or a bad week!) and keep going. Passion is the reason I don’t quit even when I want to.

Passion is the reason I’m writing this blog post and sharing my experience with a hope that you’ll be encouraged to fulfill your calling to homeschool.

 

Think about it. There had to be something that kept Moses going when Pharaoh kept saying “no.” Something that kept Abraham believing even up to the twenty-fifth year after a promise was spoken to him.  Something that kept Paul going in the midst of ongoing persecution. Something that kept Jesus going until it was “finished.”

Passion gives way to unshakeable faith.

But it needs to be renewed daily.

If you find yourself losing the passion to homeschool, simply ask God to rekindle that flame.

 

5. It draws you closer to God.

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. James 4:8

When God calls us to do something out of our league, we’re going to need Him! He puts us in this position of total dependency so that He can receive all the glory. So that we can never take credit for what we couldn’t possibly do without Him.

I once thought this homeschool journey was essentially about my children’s education. I was wrong. Everything God calls us to do is always about advancing His Kingdom—about drawing us closer to Him so that we can draw others to Him.

For me, drawing closer to God means that I’m growing in love, character, perseverance, and faith. And I know with certainty that my children have front row seats to my walk with God—That I am teaching them through my actions how to respond to challenges, disappointments, setbacks, fears, blessings, mercy, and favor.

I love Solomon’s plea to the Lord, asking Him for more wisdom and knowledge to govern His people (2 Chron. 1:10). But where did this plea initiate? During his father, David’s, reign, Solomon observed the value of divine wisdom and wanted to lead God’s people as faithfully and successfully as David had.

When I think about this scripture a question comes to mind: Are my children inspired by my walk with God or discouraged by it?  After all, they are the future of God’s kingdom.


I want to end this post by saying all callings have a season. Some of us are called to homeschool for the full eighteen years, while others are meant to homeschool for less than half that time. However long or short your season is, remember that God is with you through it all and He will give you everything you need if you just ask Him.

Obviously, these aren’t the only ways to know if homeschool is your calling. I want to hear from you: What inspired you to homeschool?

 

5 Ways You're Sabotaging Your Homeschool

5 Ways You’re Sabotaging Your Homeschool Success

When I stumbled across the book, Don’t Limit God, by Andrew Wommack, I found myself unable to put it down. Let me confess that I don’t watch television and am unfamiliar with Mr. Wommack’s ministry, so I don’t know much about him. What I do know is that God spoke to my heart through his book.

Earlier this week, I posted a photo on Instagram with Wommack’s book pictured. A friend of mine inquired of the book by asking how it resonated with me. Instead of replying with a long-winded comment, I decided to write a post about it.

Now this book focuses on taking limits off God to expand our potential for success. Obviously, it resonated with me business-wise, but I felt led to share how the book resonated with me when it came to my homeschool journey. As a disclaimer, these points are directed at me also, so I am not pointing fingers. And, of course, this post is from the perspective of Faith.

Here goes…


5 Ways You’re Sabotaging Your Homeschool Success


1. You Don’t Believe You Can. This is a common concern amongst homeschool parents—they just don’t think they’re cut-out for the job! I shared this sentiment, despite the fact that I studied curriculum development and earned a Master’s degree in Education. There were several “buts” that I begged God to consider. “But I’m not smart enough.” “But I’m not patient enough.” “But I don’t have enough money.” The list seemed infinite.

Still, God said, “With me, you are enough.”

If God had a limited mind like us, He would’ve never called Sarah to bear the promised son even though she was past child-bearing age. He would’ve never called Moses to lead the Israelites to the Promised Land even though he had a speech impediment. And, He most certainly wouldn’t have called Christ to take our place on the cross even though we didn’t deserve such grace.

So, you see, it may not make much sense to you but God certainly knows why He called you. In fact, God has a history of choosing unqualified candidates to carry out His purpose. The Word says, “Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise” (I Cor. 1:26-27). Why does God choose unqualified candidates? “So that your faith may not rest on human wisdom, but on God’s power” (1 Cor. 2:5).

With God, you are enough!

2. You compare yourself to others. It’s dangerous to measure the success of your homeschool by the standards of other homeschool families. Yes, I’ve had a few noses turned up at me when I confessed to building my own curriculum rather than purchasing a boxed one. Yes, sometimes I subscribed to the belief that our homeschool would be more successful if we had money to do things like “that other family.” But in those moments, I limit God…and you will, too.

God wants us to discover that there is more than one cookie-cutter way to run a successful homeschool. Don’t miss out on some beautiful discoveries by trying to be like that other family. Those “beautiful discoveries” may minister to struggling homeschool parents one day.

Instead, we must adopt apostle Paul’s attitude when he says, “I do not think I am the least inferior to those ‘super-apostles.’ I may indeed be untrained as a speaker, but I do have knowledge” (2 Cor. 11:5-6). Here, Apostle Paul admits to not being a great speaker like the other apostles, but he doesn’t allow comparison to make him feel inferior. Instead, he focuses on what he does have and trusts that God will compensate for the rest as he carries out God’s purpose.

There is something that you have to offer your homeschool family and community that no one else can. Ask God to reveal to you what that “something” is, so that when you find yourself feeling inferior to other homeschool parents, you can quickly remind yourself that you also have what it takes.

3. You don’t aim high enough. Guess what? You’re called to raise the bar, not submit to it. Deuteronomy 28:13 says this, “The Lord will make you the head, not the tail…you will always be at the top, never the bottom.” This is God’s vision for those who obey Him.

Let me paint a picture for you; last year, I read numerous resources about homeschool and subscribed to some really “average” ideologies. For instance, it’s become a culture to boast of laziness, expect bad days, and count an impromptu day at the beach as a “field-trip.” Let me just say, there is grace in these practices, but we should never set them as our standard. We limit God when we try to be like everyone else.

Instead, aim for excellence in your homeschool. Boast of productive days, set high expectations, and call an impromptu day at the beach what it truly is…a day at the beach!

4. You’re too busy. In order for our homeschool to reach its potential, we must take enough time out of our busy schedule to just be still, hear God, and receive instruction. God speaks to us in many ways, but the Word reminds us that sometimes God’s voice is but a gentle whisper that can only be heard when we quiet our lives (1 Kings 19: 11-12).

Some of us make our lifestyle unconducive to having a growing relationship with God. There are never-ending house chores, a morning full of school work, an afternoon full of extracurricular activities, and an evening full of scrambling to catch up on work that was missed. And then we go to bed with all the cares of this world dominating our thoughts, infiltrating our hearts and spirit.

I’m here to tell you that if you are not still enough to receive God’s instruction for your homeschool, you are treading dangerous waters. But don’t just take my word for it, remember that it is God who lights our path (Psalm 119:105).

5. You fear failure. This has by far been a primary concern amidst homeschool parents— the fear of failing to properly educate our children. In fact, this fear has been strong enough to drive many parents to quit. What a way to limit God and your homeschool potential!

Why focus on the worst case scenario when you can focus on all the wonderful things that could go right? “As a man thinks within himself, so he is” (Prov. 23:7). That means, if you’re not careful, what you believe will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Fear cancels out faith. And without faith, there is no hope. Therefore, you must visualize your child’s success. See them holding that college degree, succeeding in their dream career, purchasing their first home—whatever hopes you have for their future, meditate on it (Hebrews 11:1).

Lastly, I want to remind you that God did not give us the spirit of fear, but the power, love and self-discipline to carry out His purpose for our lives (2 Tim. 1:7).


Homeschooling is challenging enough, don’t do it without God’s help! If you are reading this and have not accepted Christ into your life, but want to, simply repeat this prayer:

“Dear heavenly Father, I know that I’m a sinner and I need your help. I believe that your son, Jesus Christ, died for my sins, was buried, and rose from the dead to fulfill your Word. I accept Christ into my life and into my heart as my personal lord and savior. Thank you, Lord, for forgiving me. I now rejoice because I am free from condemnation! In Jesus name, Amen.”

If you said that prayer and believed it with your whole heart, CONGRATULATIONS! You are officially born again! Drop me a line at nikemanderson@gmail.com and let me know how I can help you!